Husband and wife: should authority be absolute? Yorùbá ideology.
According to Yorùbá context, husbands are seen as symbolic crowns of authority on the heads of their wives.
Sighting from a poem by Olúyẹ́misí Adébọ̀wálé's "Ohun Ẹlẹgẹ́ ni àṣẹ" (Authority is Delicate) is a poem centered on the authority a husband has on his wife in the Yorùbá context. This idea is summed up in the following:
Akọ ladé orí aya
Akọ ladé orí abo
Ọkọ ni baálé lọ́ọ̀dẹ̀
Ọkọ l'Elédùà dá lápàṣẹ
Aya l'Elédùà ṣe lágbáṣẹ
B'Ólú bá dá ẹ lágbáṣẹ
Yára fayọ̀ rẹ ara rẹ sílẹ̀
Kó o tẹríba fáṣẹ Ọba Ńlá.
( A man is the crown of a wife
A man is the crown of a woman
A husband is the head of the family
It is the husband the Almighty God gives the power of authority
It is the wife the Almighty God makes to obey the authority
If God makes you to obey authority
Do humble yourself gladly
And submit to the authority of the most High God..)
Thus, the poet postulates that this authority should not be absolute while urging the woman to be submissive to their husbands.
Be submissive, be careful, be patient for the betterment of your life, your children and the society at large.
The authority of a husband over the wife shouldn't be absolute if not you make your wife feel like a slave and that's not who she's meant to be to the husband. God's authority is absolute however, his absolute nature is not showcased in absolute authority over man. There is flexible in terms of our relationship with HIM. In as much as the husband's authority should be what it is, I'll say the authority over his wife should be definite. Definite in this context means that his wife must or ought to show forth an exhibition, acceptance and awareness or acknowledgment of the authority of her husband especially in the ways she attends to Her husband's needs. For example: when he calls her 'sweetheart', she could response in a way that shows acknowledgment of his authority over her. When she serves him food also. Some little activities she should make him feel he's in charge.
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